I had become a really good excuse maker......"My knee hurts"......"I'll meet you up there in a minute"......"No, I'd rather stand, thanks"........After 8 years of Open Houses and Concerts at our little school, I had a whole repertoire.....all designed to keep me from having to climb the numerous flights of stairs, or sit in those desks....you know, the torturous ones that have the table top attached to the seat. Why did I go to such lengths, to avoid those things? Because I couldn't climb one of those flights of stairs (much less the three flights required to go from the lower building to the upper) without being so out of breath that I thought I might faint. Because I could not so much as wedge my ever increasing girth into one of those demon desks in a classroom, That's why!
Tonight, at the 9th straight Open House I have attended at our little school (Where Baby Girl will be a SENIOR!) ( Babiest Girl would have been a Freshman, but I can now release the news that she will be attending a fancy school in a neighboring town, and BOY, is she excited!), I climbed those stairs - ALL. OF. THEM.....even the three flights between buildings. I sat in those desks - with room to spare between my body and the laminate desktop....Nothing hurt, I was never out of breath....not once, and my biggest fear of all, getting stuck in one of those damnable desks - evaporated - like a drop of rain falling on a steamy sidewalk. As cheesy as it sounds, I don't mind admitting that when I climbed the last few steps of the three flights, the song from Rocky was blaring in my head, resonating with a jubilance reserved for major life events....and make no mistake....this. was. one.
There have been many such victories, in the last few weeks - I have made the transition from Plus Size clothing to what I have long referred to as Regular People clothing. I can cross my legs - something I haven't done in over 20 years. I can reach the back of my head with my curling iron, and not have to prop my arm on the wall by the sink to hold it there. I can bend over in a chair and buckle my shoes. I can once again, for the first time since we were Newlyweds, steal one of Johns Tee Shirts and have it be big enough for a night shirt. My rings, once devices of circulation strangulation are now falling off of my fingers (I recently lost my thumb ring - only to find it on the floorboard of the car). I can work in the yard, and use a dustpan. I can get down on my knees to peer into the cavernous depths of my baking dish cupboard, AND get back up. I actually carried boxes and other assorted heavy items into College Boys Dorm last weekend....multiple trips, up stairs and hills, instead of staying in the room and "organizing", like I did last year....in short, after 62 pounds lost, I am a functioning human again.
I list these things, not to brag, but to catalog....against the day that I falter - days when temptation and diet exhaustion get the better of me....to remind myself that NOTHING tastes as good as climbing those stairs tonight FELT....to remind myself that a large Coke from the Sonic is a poor substitute for the satisfaction I felt as I slipped into that desk.....to remind myself that there are even greater things waiting for me at the end of this weight loss journey....bike rides, and a hike up to the Appalachian Trail.....zip lining and indoor skydiving (Hey - they're on my bucket list)....high heels and a slinky dress (Yes, the Diva in me only lies dormant - not dead!).....Health....Fitness....who knows what I will dream up while I loose the last 40 pounds....after all....you're only as young as you feel.....Thanks be to God.
Wednesday, August 21, 2013
Saturday, August 3, 2013
Harmony.....
It smelled of fresh paint. The sun was streaming in the tall windows - 7 on each side of the room. From my perch behind the microphone I could see blue sky, and I watched the trees dancing in the gentle summer breeze. It was, in short, one of the most precious experiences of my life, and even though the Sanctuary was empty, it was truly Spiritual. This afternoon, we went over to the Church - College Boy and I - to practice our music for tomorrow. My Son and I will be singing our first ever duet - He will take the lead.
I should have known that he would grow up to be a fine musician. When he was a toddler, he sang all of the time. We sang together at bath time, at bedtime, and all of the in between times. The amazing thing, is that even at a very early age - he could hold the melody line, while I sang a few notes of harmony. His favorite toy? A little electronic violin that would play 7 or 8 different tunes....the trick was that you had to move the "bow" over the electronic sensor in the correct rhythm, or it would just be a random series of notes. The labeling on the package read "for 8 years and up"......College Boy mastered it before his third birthday.
So tomorrow, he will raise his voice, and play his guitar - He will lead the music in our early service - in the House of God where I was raised by my parents.....the same House of God where I, in turn, raised my children. As we sang today - our voices rising and falling in harmony and synchronized breath - my minds eye offered up a vivid slide show. Me, standing in the choir loft at the same age College Boy is now, singing a duet with my Father, who was also an outstanding musician....Holding my baby boy, there in that very Sanctuary, as he was dedicated to the Lord...Watching him Process down the aisle in his little white choir robe with the big red collar - waving his Palm Branch (a more accurate description might be "bashing his friends in the head with his Palm Branch", but still.....). I saw him as a young teenager, standing tall and proud in front of the altar, as he received his Eagle Scout award....but most of all, I saw him floating in the Bathtub, singing his favorite songs - "You are my Sunshine", "Goodnight Ladies" (Do not ASK me how this song found it's way into a two year old's repertoire - I can not tell you, but he sang it with great enthusiasm....), and anything from The Jungle Book or Pete's Dragon.
As we practiced this afternoon, I felt the presence of my Fathers....the Earthly One, long gone to his reward, and the Heavenly One - who delights in the voices of His Children. Standing there on the podium, in my usual place - at the end, just to the left of the piano, I delighted in the voice of MY Child....of our voices together - just as they were so many years ago....the Same, yet different - separate voices, weaving notes and love together...fed by the music, the harmony and the Spirit.
Tomorrow, I will marvel at how my little boy has grown into this man...I will stand in awe of his talents....I will sing with my Son during Worship - knowing that I am blessed.....beyond measure.
I should have known that he would grow up to be a fine musician. When he was a toddler, he sang all of the time. We sang together at bath time, at bedtime, and all of the in between times. The amazing thing, is that even at a very early age - he could hold the melody line, while I sang a few notes of harmony. His favorite toy? A little electronic violin that would play 7 or 8 different tunes....the trick was that you had to move the "bow" over the electronic sensor in the correct rhythm, or it would just be a random series of notes. The labeling on the package read "for 8 years and up"......College Boy mastered it before his third birthday.
So tomorrow, he will raise his voice, and play his guitar - He will lead the music in our early service - in the House of God where I was raised by my parents.....the same House of God where I, in turn, raised my children. As we sang today - our voices rising and falling in harmony and synchronized breath - my minds eye offered up a vivid slide show. Me, standing in the choir loft at the same age College Boy is now, singing a duet with my Father, who was also an outstanding musician....Holding my baby boy, there in that very Sanctuary, as he was dedicated to the Lord...Watching him Process down the aisle in his little white choir robe with the big red collar - waving his Palm Branch (a more accurate description might be "bashing his friends in the head with his Palm Branch", but still.....). I saw him as a young teenager, standing tall and proud in front of the altar, as he received his Eagle Scout award....but most of all, I saw him floating in the Bathtub, singing his favorite songs - "You are my Sunshine", "Goodnight Ladies" (Do not ASK me how this song found it's way into a two year old's repertoire - I can not tell you, but he sang it with great enthusiasm....), and anything from The Jungle Book or Pete's Dragon.
As we practiced this afternoon, I felt the presence of my Fathers....the Earthly One, long gone to his reward, and the Heavenly One - who delights in the voices of His Children. Standing there on the podium, in my usual place - at the end, just to the left of the piano, I delighted in the voice of MY Child....of our voices together - just as they were so many years ago....the Same, yet different - separate voices, weaving notes and love together...fed by the music, the harmony and the Spirit.
Tomorrow, I will marvel at how my little boy has grown into this man...I will stand in awe of his talents....I will sing with my Son during Worship - knowing that I am blessed.....beyond measure.
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