It was a moment that hung suspended in terror and mortification. A moment where time slowed to such an extent that I found myself able to relive the entire day up to that point, and still have ample time to cover up and holler.....loudly.
This Tuesday began at a slightly slower pace than normal....Babiest Girl was home sick (She is, thankfully, feeling better), and Baby Girl - owing to the three day weekend didn't have to be back on campus until after lunch. So there was Coffee AND breakfast....time to fuss over hair and makeup, love on the sick one, pick up new contacts for Baby G AND make it to campus early, allowing us to grab one more cup of coffee (At the coolio shop that I refer to as "The place formerly known as Friars Cellar", which is what it was in the golden days of my carefree youth). One last hug for my beautiful growndy up girl and I was off towards the Dinner Theatre for my Matinee.
Now, it is not a long drive - a straight shot down the thoroughfare, and a left before you hit the underpass. It was however just long enough for the Coffee to work it's number on my bladder. By the time I parked the car and grabbed my theatre bag, I was doing "the dance"....which is, as I have stated before, a direct result of three kids born, and not enough Kegels done. I climbed the steep back stairs to the actors quarters and dashed to my dressing room which, mercifully has an attached restroom. Quick as a wink, I had dropped my bag at my table, flipped the light switch and locked the door. Seeing as how it is a show day, I was forced to wrestle with heavy spandex tights AND a set of Spanx (Too much info, I know...but it sets up the visual). I arose the victor, and.....finally. Whew....I made it.
Now let me pause here to acquaint you with the layout of the little bathroom. Toilet tucked in a tight corner, sink in front...and a funny little window, which allows you a lovely view of the sky and the tin roof on the Theatre bellow. I always feel like I am in a tower when I am in that bathroom....one that I have made use of for over 30 years. Come to think of it, it is the most constant "facility"of my Fiftysome years. But I digress.....Imagine my shock, as I looked out that high tower window from my perch on the throne and saw, not sky nor tin roof....but MAN!....gazing into said tower window. I'm guessing he was too bumfuzzled to look away, having witnessed my tug of war with my foundation garments...so there we were - face to face...frozen in terror and mortification. My scream loosened his feet, and now HE was the one doing the dance...scampering away as if the roof were lava. It is a good thing I was in the appropriate place, or I would have needed to do laundry before the First Act.
This is just a guess, but I am thinking that poor man might be reconsidering his choice of profession (he was a roofer) right about now, because....let's face it - there are just some things you can't unsee. My friend, acting partner and Boon Companion helped me assure our future privacy....There is now an old cork board propped up against our beautiful little tower window- wedged in place by a huge water jug. Obscuring the beautiful sky, but ensuring the safety and privacy of the "go"......
